Honestly. I'm a mess. I feel empty. Conflicted. Fulfilled. Happy. Sad. I can't function. It was amazing.
I'll talk to you later. I need to go and hibernate now.
***
Okay so it is the next day and I am slowly creeping out of the empty hole in my chest to write about the book. Think of this as my therapy. MUCH NEEDED THERAPY. *hugs book to chest* "don't leave me!"
The book, is beautiful. Not just in words, but appearance as well. I love the covers of this series. I have never been so afraid to touch a book in my entire life! I would sit and stare at it, wanting to open the book but so afraid of what I would find. Oh boy.. What I found.
Essentially, if you haven't read this book and you have stumbled across my therapy session. Piss off now. You will ruin everything for yourself.
The book started with plenty of "action" Benedict as a worm! Little laugh out loud moment there... Oh! I forgot the prologue! Adele. What a nice little twist... I feel like I can't say anything without getting ahead of myself. Authors. You are amazing.
Jem... Oh my Jem.. Don't get me wrong. I have been a full on, paint the town red, hardcore Will shipper. But Jem broke my heart. I haven't sobbed at a book for as long as I can remember! The scene between Will and Jem before Will goes to save Tessa. I CRIED THE WHOLE TIME. had to keep pausing to wipe the leakage from my eyes. Jem. Gah! SCREW JUMPING AHEAD! I cried. A lot. I was a mess when the parabati rune thing went KABOOM... Well not like that. And then! To bring him back just as my heart was starting to mend. Oh wait! I bawled like a baby when Jem was like how his greatest regret would not getting to meet Charlotte's baby. Softie I know. Right but bringing him back! I have never felt so sick at a plot twist. Oh my Jem. Fighting together one last time. WAAAHHHH. Henry! Then he was okay. But what happened to Cyril!! WHAT HAPPENED TO CYRIL! Saying he was limp on the ground does not constitute telling me he died! If he died... Smidgen confused.
Will and Tessa. Okay I got my ship. But so did the Jessa ones. It's confusing I know. They had sex... Okay whatevs. And he got his star thing from Tessa's angel. After they had sex... Ummm.. HAHAHAHA!
And Will was all you can have my shadowhunter last name. And Jessamine!
Found out what Tessa was. How that all worked out. Broke my heart entirely in the epilogue. Tessa got to have a wonderful life with Will. And his death scene! WHY TELL ME! :'( WHY!
She left. I would hate to be immortal. Will got old. But he only loved Tessa. And he died. Died.
Jem is mortal again! I am so confused yet so happy at the same time. I feel like my brain isn't coherent enough for anything to make sense. Brother Zacharia. Just! WHAT.. When Jem.. Brother Zacharia came back I cried. When he left Will I cried. And cried again today when I accidentally opened the book up to that bit.
If this is bittersweet. Hell I don't want to imagine what I would have been like if she went all out devo.
I miss my friends. (2013)